Happy TENTH birthday, Your X-cellency!Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Hooking 'em younger and younger...
"Why yes I do have older siblings. And why do you ask?"Well, Hayden, it may have something to do with the earphones and wii remote in your lap!
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Golden Cheeseburger
On Friday, driving the kids home from school, the song "Cheeseburger in Paradise" came on. Of course all the kids love it so I cranked it. The first line goes, "Tried to amend my carnivorous habits...". That word, "carnivorous", registered as familiar to Meghan and Evan.
"Hey! He said 'carnivorous'! Why did he say 'carnivorous'?"
Well.... they are used to hearing that word in the unfortunate context of one of their parents telling the screaming baby to "shut his carnivorous pie-hole". It reads worse than it actually is, since it is said lovingly in a cooing sort of way. Originally the phrase was to shut his cavernous pie-hole. Also fitting. But like nearly all names and phrases used in this household, it morphed.
So back to the story, hearing an unusual-though-familiar word made the kids curious as to what this song was about. So I explained that Jimmy was on a no-meat diet, etc., but at night he would dream about cheeseburgers.
"Oh. The song's a dream. I never knew that."
No, it's not a dream. We ended up going line-by-line. I told them what each line actually was, and then a brief explanation of what it meant.
"OHHHHH! I thought he said '[something that makes no sense at all]'".
Don't we all know how that is?! A certain New Order song about being shot right through with a "bolt of blue" comes to my mind... I always thought it was "bow harpoon". Not that I ever knew what a bow harpoon was (we didn't have Wikipedia back then). Or how about REM's "What's the Frequency Kenneth"? There's a minefield of miscommunication. You tell me, in the first line, is it "what's the frequency, kenneth, is your benzadrine" OR is it, "what's the frequency, kenneth, is your Benz a dream"? and later on, "You wore a shirt of violent green" OR is it, "You are a short, violent freak." None of those translations make much sense, but Michael Stipe would say it's the first option in both examples. Oh well. Back in the eighties and nineties we didn't have lyrics.com, so we did the best we could with our bare ears. And my ears are notoriously bad at deciphering song lyrics, as well as English in general if spoken by a southerner, australian, brit, indian, or really any non-native American. I am fairly decent at understanding preschoolers, though.
Back to the song, there are quite a few things that the kids didn't understand... what is warm beer? a Holiday Inn? Havanas? Daquiris? Heinz 57? Draft beer? This song was not looking so pretty when undressed. Add to that, I always feel uneasy singing the line "Good God Almighty which way do I steer...", for obvious reasons. Hmm. Better explain some things to the kids. So I asked Evan to tell me the first three commandments, which he is currently memorizing in school.
"1. You shall have no other gods before me. 2. You shall not make for yourself an idol. 3. You shall not misuse the name of the LORD, your God."
"This song," I told him, "breaks two of those commandments."
Silence. Better help him a little... "Good God Almighty. Is that not misusing the name of the LORD?"
"Oh yeah."
"And would you say that the cheeseburger might be an idol to him?"
"Hmmm. He made a big golden cheeseburger." Idol = golden calf. Therefore, golden cheeseburger. The logical deductions of a six-year-old. Gotta love it!
Well, Meghan and I thought that was pretty funny. And that made Evan and Tressa laugh too. We all had a good laugh picturing the golden cheeseburger. Hopefully that will help them remember the lesson! I'll never forget how my own mother ruined the song "Jesse's Girl" for me back when I was a kid by telling me that Rick was coveting Jesse's girlfriend... and thereby violating the tenth commandment. Perhaps my kids will have a headstart on discernment. But then again, maybe this lesson was for me. Maybe I should quit listening to certain songs, and certainly in the presence of little ears. As I recently read in a sermon transcription, "99% pure water, 1% sewage - I am not drinking". Not bad advice.
"Hey! He said 'carnivorous'! Why did he say 'carnivorous'?"
Well.... they are used to hearing that word in the unfortunate context of one of their parents telling the screaming baby to "shut his carnivorous pie-hole". It reads worse than it actually is, since it is said lovingly in a cooing sort of way. Originally the phrase was to shut his cavernous pie-hole. Also fitting. But like nearly all names and phrases used in this household, it morphed.
So back to the story, hearing an unusual-though-familiar word made the kids curious as to what this song was about. So I explained that Jimmy was on a no-meat diet, etc., but at night he would dream about cheeseburgers.
"Oh. The song's a dream. I never knew that."
No, it's not a dream. We ended up going line-by-line. I told them what each line actually was, and then a brief explanation of what it meant.
"OHHHHH! I thought he said '[something that makes no sense at all]'".
Don't we all know how that is?! A certain New Order song about being shot right through with a "bolt of blue" comes to my mind... I always thought it was "bow harpoon". Not that I ever knew what a bow harpoon was (we didn't have Wikipedia back then). Or how about REM's "What's the Frequency Kenneth"? There's a minefield of miscommunication. You tell me, in the first line, is it "what's the frequency, kenneth, is your benzadrine" OR is it, "what's the frequency, kenneth, is your Benz a dream"? and later on, "You wore a shirt of violent green" OR is it, "You are a short, violent freak." None of those translations make much sense, but Michael Stipe would say it's the first option in both examples. Oh well. Back in the eighties and nineties we didn't have lyrics.com, so we did the best we could with our bare ears. And my ears are notoriously bad at deciphering song lyrics, as well as English in general if spoken by a southerner, australian, brit, indian, or really any non-native American. I am fairly decent at understanding preschoolers, though.
Back to the song, there are quite a few things that the kids didn't understand... what is warm beer? a Holiday Inn? Havanas? Daquiris? Heinz 57? Draft beer? This song was not looking so pretty when undressed. Add to that, I always feel uneasy singing the line "Good God Almighty which way do I steer...", for obvious reasons. Hmm. Better explain some things to the kids. So I asked Evan to tell me the first three commandments, which he is currently memorizing in school.
"1. You shall have no other gods before me. 2. You shall not make for yourself an idol. 3. You shall not misuse the name of the LORD, your God."
"This song," I told him, "breaks two of those commandments."
Silence. Better help him a little... "Good God Almighty. Is that not misusing the name of the LORD?"
"Oh yeah."
"And would you say that the cheeseburger might be an idol to him?"
"Hmmm. He made a big golden cheeseburger." Idol = golden calf. Therefore, golden cheeseburger. The logical deductions of a six-year-old. Gotta love it!
Well, Meghan and I thought that was pretty funny. And that made Evan and Tressa laugh too. We all had a good laugh picturing the golden cheeseburger. Hopefully that will help them remember the lesson! I'll never forget how my own mother ruined the song "Jesse's Girl" for me back when I was a kid by telling me that Rick was coveting Jesse's girlfriend... and thereby violating the tenth commandment. Perhaps my kids will have a headstart on discernment. But then again, maybe this lesson was for me. Maybe I should quit listening to certain songs, and certainly in the presence of little ears. As I recently read in a sermon transcription, "99% pure water, 1% sewage - I am not drinking". Not bad advice.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Where did this little dark girl come from?
Could it be we've told Meghan one too many times that we bought her from the indians? This is how she dressed for "Colonial Ancestry Day" at school.... 
..... hahaha! Actually she did a report on William Clark (as in Lewis & Clark) for "Colonial Day", so naturally she dressed as Sacagawea.
..... hahaha! Actually she did a report on William Clark (as in Lewis & Clark) for "Colonial Day", so naturally she dressed as Sacagawea.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Good cards! 
Thursday, April 2, 2009
2009 First Quarter Memories
Some stuff worth remembering...
January 1: We took a family field trip to Arlington Cemetery. Yes it was freezing cold out, but sunny, and I really wanted to see the wreathes. Meghan and Evan thought it was a "cool" field trip.
January 3: Today was Evan's first ever basketball game. It was fun watching the little guys (1st-2nd grade), but painful at times! Afterwards in the car Evan told me he was a little bit afraid to go to basketball at the first practice because he is a little afraid to meet new people. He is glad he did though, because the boys are so nice and they are all friends now.
January 7: Tressa told me that my wedding ring is like "Fancy Nancy". Today Tressa and I played a pretend version of Webkinz... all Tressa's idea. She took one of her LPS figurines (Molly the chihuahua first, named after Meghan's real Webkinz chihuahua Molly), and on her Doodle-Pro Jr. she had me "adopt" Molly by writing her name. Then we drew a room for Molly with a bed, books, etc. Erase. Then we played webkinz games like cashcow, wheel-o-wow, wishing well, and some we made up - like chicken dance. All this on the Doodle Pro Jr., which was her "computer". Then we started over with the next LPS figure... Seally, Slowpoke, etc.
January 13: Caught Hayden drinking from an empty beer bottle! Funny! Maybe there's a link between that and him falling down the stairs at bedtime... No actually he's been dying to get to those stairs for a long time, and tonight he had his chance when the gate was down and I was distracted.
January 15: Tressa told me that she has to put on her lipstick (chapstick) so that her lips smell good! Too cute.
January 19: This evening after dinner Evan and Tressa had a pretend wedding. Evan played some polka music and the two of them danced together. Adorable. I knew they'd been doing this wedding game lately, but this is the first time I've seen it.
January 23: Today Tressa and Evan were watching the Veggie Tales version of Moses (from Duke and the Great Pie War) and Tressa started crying because whe was scared for the baby Moses when he was alone in the water. What a tender heart she has.
February 1: Tressa asked me, "what kind of milk is in your boobs, Mom?" You know - cow's? goat's? almond? rice? soy? chocolate?
February 3: This morn Tressa woke up and went downstairs looking for the big kids. I called her back up and she said, "are the big kids at school?" "Yes, they're at school," I told her. So she continued up the stairs a few steps, then started crying quietly. I said, "Tressa, why are you crying?" to which she responded, "Evan is my best friend." "Oh, you miss Evan?" "Ya." What a sweet sister.
February 5: This evening Tressa and Evan were spinning and dancing in the family room. Tressa lost her balance and crashed into the wooden arm of one of the recliners. Now she has a gash on the back of her head. Later I told Tressa to get her "little white butt" back to the table to finish her dinner. Meghan thought that was funny, but then came up with her own... "Get your bloody head back to the table!" Would have been funnier with a british accent. Tressa didn't appreciate it, though, what a surprise.
February 18: At dinner tonight Meghan opined, "if only Adam and Eve hadn't sinned!" Ain't that the truth!
March 5: Hayden's first haircut!
March 10: Today Meghan told me that sometimes at night when she and Evan are in their beds in their own rooms, she reads to him a story over the walkie-talkies. How cute.
March 14: Tonight when we got home from dinner, we were outside the van and I had my hands full, and so did Craig. I had left my drink in the van, so I said to Craig, "Can you get my drink... or do you not have enough hands?" Immediately Tressa blurted out, "Mom, he has two hands, of course!"
March 25: Tonight about 8:45 Hayden was crying hard so I went in and rocked him. Then Meghan came in and he wanted her to hold him. He was so happy to be in her arms! He even pushed my hand away! Needless to say, he was hysterical when Megs gave him back to me. He kept reaching for her. So cute. I love that he loves her so much. "Little Mom" is what I call her. She adores him too.
January 1: We took a family field trip to Arlington Cemetery. Yes it was freezing cold out, but sunny, and I really wanted to see the wreathes. Meghan and Evan thought it was a "cool" field trip.
January 3: Today was Evan's first ever basketball game. It was fun watching the little guys (1st-2nd grade), but painful at times! Afterwards in the car Evan told me he was a little bit afraid to go to basketball at the first practice because he is a little afraid to meet new people. He is glad he did though, because the boys are so nice and they are all friends now.
January 7: Tressa told me that my wedding ring is like "Fancy Nancy". Today Tressa and I played a pretend version of Webkinz... all Tressa's idea. She took one of her LPS figurines (Molly the chihuahua first, named after Meghan's real Webkinz chihuahua Molly), and on her Doodle-Pro Jr. she had me "adopt" Molly by writing her name. Then we drew a room for Molly with a bed, books, etc. Erase. Then we played webkinz games like cashcow, wheel-o-wow, wishing well, and some we made up - like chicken dance. All this on the Doodle Pro Jr., which was her "computer". Then we started over with the next LPS figure... Seally, Slowpoke, etc.
January 13: Caught Hayden drinking from an empty beer bottle! Funny! Maybe there's a link between that and him falling down the stairs at bedtime... No actually he's been dying to get to those stairs for a long time, and tonight he had his chance when the gate was down and I was distracted.
January 15: Tressa told me that she has to put on her lipstick (chapstick) so that her lips smell good! Too cute.
January 19: This evening after dinner Evan and Tressa had a pretend wedding. Evan played some polka music and the two of them danced together. Adorable. I knew they'd been doing this wedding game lately, but this is the first time I've seen it.
January 23: Today Tressa and Evan were watching the Veggie Tales version of Moses (from Duke and the Great Pie War) and Tressa started crying because whe was scared for the baby Moses when he was alone in the water. What a tender heart she has.
February 1: Tressa asked me, "what kind of milk is in your boobs, Mom?" You know - cow's? goat's? almond? rice? soy? chocolate?
February 3: This morn Tressa woke up and went downstairs looking for the big kids. I called her back up and she said, "are the big kids at school?" "Yes, they're at school," I told her. So she continued up the stairs a few steps, then started crying quietly. I said, "Tressa, why are you crying?" to which she responded, "Evan is my best friend." "Oh, you miss Evan?" "Ya." What a sweet sister.
February 5: This evening Tressa and Evan were spinning and dancing in the family room. Tressa lost her balance and crashed into the wooden arm of one of the recliners. Now she has a gash on the back of her head. Later I told Tressa to get her "little white butt" back to the table to finish her dinner. Meghan thought that was funny, but then came up with her own... "Get your bloody head back to the table!" Would have been funnier with a british accent. Tressa didn't appreciate it, though, what a surprise.
February 18: At dinner tonight Meghan opined, "if only Adam and Eve hadn't sinned!" Ain't that the truth!
March 5: Hayden's first haircut!
March 10: Today Meghan told me that sometimes at night when she and Evan are in their beds in their own rooms, she reads to him a story over the walkie-talkies. How cute.
March 14: Tonight when we got home from dinner, we were outside the van and I had my hands full, and so did Craig. I had left my drink in the van, so I said to Craig, "Can you get my drink... or do you not have enough hands?" Immediately Tressa blurted out, "Mom, he has two hands, of course!"
March 25: Tonight about 8:45 Hayden was crying hard so I went in and rocked him. Then Meghan came in and he wanted her to hold him. He was so happy to be in her arms! He even pushed my hand away! Needless to say, he was hysterical when Megs gave him back to me. He kept reaching for her. So cute. I love that he loves her so much. "Little Mom" is what I call her. She adores him too.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
Feeding the Squirrels
This is Evan on March 2nd. He is taking a can of cocktail peanuts out to feed the squirrels. Classy.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
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